“How hard it is to retrain your thinking when you are in a negative loop due to trauma or brain chemistry. That or sex.”
Yeah gonna totally disappoint everyone and ignore the sexy part, for many, many reasons. pffffttttt
Trauma. Brain chemistry. These are huge topics, and really we know so very little about either. For a long time it was thought that the brain was a static organ, that aside from trauma, it could not change — like the liver or heart, it was what it was and unless it was actively damaged or chemically altered, it was not going to morph in any way.
It’s a brand new day in neuroscience, though, because it is clear that the brain is constantly in a state of activity which can include profound changes (good and bad) and that rather than being an isolated reservoir of intelligence stuck on top of our spine, the brain creates our conscious and unconscious selves in conjunction with our gut microbiome and who knows what else. Seriously, insofar as understanding brain function, we are all Jon Snow.
The thing is, knowing about the plasticity of the brain doesn’t make it easier to change how we think. It’s compounded when things such as PTSD, clinical depression, trauma, and other mental illnesses/disorders or injuries are at play. Is it all chemical? Will probiotics help? Do you just need an iron supplement? WHAT IS THE SECRET?
In the meantime, those of us who are actively trying to change the function of our brains try everything. I mean, everything. Whatever it is we are dealing with, we put our all into it. We literally have nothing to lose.
I myself am on paxil for anxiety and panic attacks; this is the foundation. On top I lay over probiotics, fish oil supplements (I do not like eating fish much, so…), D3, magnesium, vit.K, and a women’s multivitamin. On top of THAT I meditate daily, using both guided meditations and binural beats. On top of those I throw in positive affirmations and creative visualization because why the hell not. Finally, the coup de grâce is therapy once or twice a month.
You think this shit is easy? IT IS NOT. And I’m someone who is otherwise generally in overall good health, no chronic illnesses, just a sometimes wonky lower back and a history of eating disorders. My mother, for example, was always trying new ways to change her brain while dealing with bi-polar disorder, asthma, CFIDS, obesity, eating disorders, high blood pressure, and (eventually) cancer. Seriously, what the actual fuck. In what universe is that fair????
Anyway, the real question is, does any of that work for me? Yes, it does. But it works in conjunction, I think — the supplements, the paxil, the meditations, the therapy, the affirmations. I’m pretty sure dropping any one of those elements would slow down the process at the very least. I’m also sure that this is an individualized “recipe”, and that everyone else has their own unique set of variables.
Along the way, I read one of the most helpful books I’ve ever read in my life: The Body Keeps the Score, by trauma expert Dr. Bessel van der Kolk. To quote the blurb:
“…he transforms our understanding of traumatic stress, revealing how it literally rearranges the brain’s wiring — specifically areas dedicated to pleasure, engagement, control, and trust. He shows how these areas can be reactivated through innovative treatments including neurofeedback, mindfulness techniques, play, yoga, and other therapies.”
He does not dismiss traditional medicine, but folds it into his ideas about holistic mind/body therapy. This is the book that convinced me to try EMDR therapy, which had been recommended by my friend Ada. EMDR has completely reshaped my consciousness, and quite possibly saved my life (take that as you will). It’s not for everyone, but my point here is that something worked to help me finally move past the complex PTSD that has plagued my adult life (it’s not gone, I don’t think something like that just goes away; but it is not predominant anymore. I’m mindful of it, but not controlled by it).
Which is to say: it may not be easy, and it may in fact require a hell of a lot of work and medicine and time, but the brain can be retrained/rewired in positive ways. We will be dealing with those issues all our lives, sure, but we do not have to be slaves to our trauma. ❤
